With the release of Steve Harvey‘s new movie “Think like a Man“, the serious questions have begun to surface around gender roles, expectations and rules in the dating game. “What are your long term and short term goals?” “Are you ready to meet my kids?” “Is this relationship leading towards marriage?”
Although the movie, based on the book, only speaks to one individual’s perspective on dating, several have taken the words of the comedian/actor/gameshow host as expert advice. After all, if you want to know what a man is thinking, why not ask one, right? Many males have called Steve Harvey a traitor for revealing a playbook to women. The women who have taken his advice, believe that this “new” information has given them the power they need to “change” the game.
What women may have inferred from the message of the film is that if they follow the rules outlined in Steve’s book, eventually they will land the man of their dreams or upgrade their not so perfect mate, which can seem a lot like trickery or manipulation. Women argue that by playing by Steve’s rules, they are only defending themselves against the games that men play in relationships.
I discovered one subtle message that many viewers may have missed in the end. The most important lesson taught through this film is that dating shouldn’t be thought of as a game we play. Individuals shouldn’t treat each other like pawns. Plain and simple, “Tricks are for kids!” You have to know what you want in life and love and know the difference between settling and compromising.
So getting to the heart of the matter, dating is not so much about thinking like a man or acting like a lady, but one rule should exist for dating to be fair – both parties must honor and respect honesty as a value as they explore their compatibility.